# A Joyful Calling Sister to Sister Language: en Author: by Sheryl Zeiset Lebanon, PA Original issue: The Heartbeat of The Remnant, Summer 2022, Number 2 Source pages: 20–22 Read article: Original PDF: Summer\-2022\-Remnant\.pdf [The Heartbeat of The Remnant, Summer 2022]() I stepped quietly down the stairs, my eyes groggy\. It was midnight and a soft light glowed from my parents’ room\. My new baby brother was crying, probably what had woken me up at this hour, and I decided to check up on Mom and wee baby\. My mother was picking him up, crooning softly\. I expected her to look weary\. Instead, her eyes were sparkling with delight as she exclaimed, “Oh, he’s just hungry\!” She settled into the rocking chair and soon the house was restored to its midnight quiet\. Her joy at getting up in the middle of the night to feed her baby made a deep impression on my 18\-year\-old mind\. She gave me the unspoken message that this baby was wanted and loved, and she found deep delight in caring for him\. This was her ninth baby and I had often seen this in my mother, but this time it felt extra special\. Was my mother deprived of a fulfilling life? Throughout history the role of a woman and motherhood has been evaluated and reevaluated; respected and demonized by turn\. In the early 1900s, girls dreamed of becoming a mother just as their mothers and grandmothers before them\. By the 1970s, the centuries’\-old classic role of women was under attack\. As one woman wrote, “I was busy raising my four children\. These were the happiest years of my life, and we were shocked to suddenly hear that mothering only takes a third\-grade education and a fulltime mother is unnecessary\. Mothers who were applauded by society were suddenly bombarded with a new buzzword—fullfillment\.”1 Today, according to some online reports, roughly 27% of infants and toddlers in America are placed in some form of paid childcare arrangement\. Many of these mothers say they are happier and healthier on the job than they are at home with their children\. Perhaps they are happier because taking on a challenge provides a sense of well\-being, rather than living “discontentedly” at home\. God’s will is that women of God would find their deepest joy and fulfillment in their home and with their children\. ***The aged women** likewise, that they be in behaviour as becometh holiness, not false accusers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things; That they may **teach the young women to be** sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, To be discreet, chaste, **keepers at home**, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed –Titus 2:3\-5\.* In the past, the term “a keeper at home” had a more clearly understood and defined definition\. Today we can stay at home and yet still be consumed with *…wandering about from house to house… –1 Timothy 5:13,* on our phones\. In 2 Timothy, Paul continues … *This know also, that in the last days perilous times shall come\. For men shall be lovers of their own selves… –2 Timothy 3:1\-2\.* How much of my messaging and communication is consumed with loving myself? Technology can be a useful tool, but it can also become a distracting vice and addiction\. It can also be a source of depression and discouragement if my house, décor, birthday cakes, or holidays are compared with all the perfect accomplishments of others\. Choosing to stay at home in your focuses and thoughts produces peace and contentment\. God says, *Lo, children are an heritage of the LORD: and the fruit of the womb is his reward –Psalm 127:3\.* Our children are His heritage and His reward\! In a noisy world, full of other distractions, let’s not lose sight of this\. We want to keep a mother’s role respected and well\-defined\. But even in the church, time and technology are changing things and a subtle influence has crept in\. Lucrative online businesses grab our attention, breeding a subtle discontent\. “Me time” and “self\-care” have become buzzwords and we are fascinated with new culture fads like coffee shops and shopping malls, each of which can take focus and energy away from our children\. For some, it is easier to focus on the newest décor or an affluent lifestyle rather than a large family\. While some may question or wish to debate how many children are too many, or too little, let’s remember that God has given us some clear principles on this issue\. *Lo, children are an heritage of the LORD: and the fruit of the womb is his reward\. As arrows are in the hand of a mighty man; so are children of the youth\. Happy is the man that hath his quiver full of them: they shall not be ashamed, but they shall speak with the enemies in the gate –Psalm 127:3\-5\.* The Scripture passages that speak about children show us that God’s view regarding children is quite different from the prevailing view that many have in our world today\. An even more subtle question that I see young women wrestling with is this: “Is it more spiritual to be involved in ministry rather than to bring more children into the world?” I wrestled through this question as a young mother\. All my work in the house was done with a subconscious “I’ll get this done quickly and then I’ll have time for more important things\.” But when I look at the example of older, godly mothers, I see that their home and children were their important work—their focus\. My calling as a mother is not an inferior calling\. A peaceful home is an oasis for hurting people and few things are as refreshing and beautiful as children who are loved and “trained up” in the ways of God\. An orderly happy family is a powerful witness to our communities, and it is one way truth is propagated\. It is not a choice between family or ministry, but rather family is ministry and together we can minister to others\. No, it is not a ministry that all are called to; some are called to singleness, while others go through the difficulty of infertility\. In each of these we are called to a selfless life of service to God and others\. ![Adult holding the hand of a small child walking outdoors]() Elisabeth Elliot said, “The process of shaping the child, shapes also the mother herself\. Reverence for her sacred burden calls her to all that is pure and good, that she may teach primarily by her own humble, daily example\.”2 Reverence—first to God and then to our sacred calling—allows our own souls to be purified as we live in obedience to this calling\. In these busy years, it is easy to feel overwhelmed and discouraged with the daily responsibilities, but God sees the big picture of what is being accomplished\. It is infinitely more glorious than the messy floors and hungry tummies that I see\. He sees the souls being birthed and raised, each one as a potential soldier in His kingdom\. He sees what He is doing in our hearts as we learn to unselfishly give to our families\. He is actively involved, even when all I can see is the challenge of today\. Eventually, the child\-bearing and child\-raising years are over\. Children grow up and leave home\. Then what? In Titus 2, godly older women are described as *…teachers of good things –Titus 2:3\.* They are given the directive: *That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed –Titus 2:4\-5\.* *Let the woman learn in silence with all subjection\. But I suffer not a woman to teach, nor to usurp authority over the man, but to be in silence\. For Adam was first formed, then Eve –1 Timothy 2:11\-13\.* Just as Paul instructs us, we believe in women being silent in the church, but this doesn’t mean that women are to be silent in all situations, places, and relationships\. God has an important ministry for older women who have learned valuable life lessons and have the ability to encourage and disciple the younger generation\. The younger women also have an important ministry *…to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed –Titus 2:4\-5\.* God doesn’t need perfect women to teach the younger, rather He wants those who are honest, humble, and willing\. Often the best advice is born out of experience\. If you have made mistakes in your marriage, if you have gone through infertility or grief and have come out as a better person, you are all the more qualified to disciple a younger woman\. Experience brings compassion for another’s pain and equips you to understand and articulate the path forward for a struggling younger woman\. I hear the cry of younger women desiring to have an older sister walk beside them, but I also see older women shrinking from the task\. Can we change this? Perhaps it has never been your habit to engage in heart sharing\. Perhaps you struggle with fear as you think of being vulnerable\. Perhaps you feel like you don’t have the time it takes to include others in your life\. These hindrances are common to us all, but we can, by the grace of God, push past these fears and fulfill God’s will for us as women\. - Reach out and ask\. Don’t always wait until someone pursues you\. Choose one younger woman to befriend and learn the inner thoughts and questions of her heart\. If you have never learned how to be vulnerable in your relationships, ask God to teach you\. And He will\. - Start with small gestures of encouragement and love\. These will grow into relationships, and opportunities to influence\. - Be willing to sacrifice your time\. Ministry is a lifestyle of caring more about others than ourselves\. God needs us to be willing to use our voice\. It is His way for us to reproduce our spiritual values and bless the next generation\. Teaching others about the things of God strengthens everyone involved—the teacher and the disciple\. Truth, dissected and taught, settles into the heart\. Don’t believe the lie that we don't need spiritual vulnerability with each other\. We do need it since it is vital for our on\-going growth and maturity\. It is also vital for the health of the church and for the next generation\. Busy young mother or older woman, whatever stage of life you’re in, God has given you the tools through His spirit to be an influence for good in the lives of those around you\. *And let us not be weary in well doing: for in due season we shall reap, if we faint not –Galatians 6:9\.* ### *Endnotes:* 1. *Marionstar\.com/story/opinion/2015/05/09/role\-mothers\-changed\-years/270511951* 2. *Bookroo\.com 22 of the best book quotes from Elisabeth Elliot* ## Magazine citation - [Adult holding the hand of a small child walking outdoors](): Adobestock\.com